Updated: Oct 7, 2020
By: Logan Cohen, Professional Therapist & Online Life Coach for Men - Founder of Balanced Man Plan Online Life Coaching
A lot of Men & Boys are negatively impacted by trauma – and don’t even know it! When People think of a “traumatic experience”, most People imagine particularly pointed events – like wartime, physical violence or sexual abuse - but what about other painful childhood experiences like untreated mental illness of a Family Member, a tense divorce, or a particularly rough case of social bullying?
Less obvious traumatic experiences are called Adverse Childhood Experiences (ACE’s) and when enough of them pile on top of each other – they can also do JUST as much damage to a Person’s sense of safety in daily life as more significant traumatic experiences.
We call these experiences “little t traumas” and studies are showing that these experiences create similar – if not identical symptoms - to posttraumatic stress disorder (PTSD).
Men with trauma symptoms are commonly misdiagnosed because rather than appearing skittish or easily startled, we tend to present with irritability, control issues, addiction issues or high risk behavior. It rarely occurs to a Man – even mental healthcare providers - to consider the childhood wounds underneath.
Would you like to learn more about this in a quick video? If so, check out the short video below:
Did you find that helpful? If so - keep reading!
Since there are no wounds on the outside of the Body, Men with trauma commonly don’t even consider bringing them up as a desired focus for treatment.
In fact, these types of issues often make Men really uncomfortable because as Boys, we are taught that a “Real Man” is STRONG – as evidenced by NEVER showing Fear or Pain openly.
This is helpful training for the athletics, the battlefield & the board room - but when it comes to getting down to the “root cause” of emotional tension - this makes it extremely hard for Men with trauma to get the needed help for unresolved wounds.
Many Men with trauma fight their demons as a result of active military combat. These soldiers have a clear & obvious reason to seek the recommended course of talk therapy involved in healing the unresolved trauma – but they commonly avoid this process largely due to the IMPOSSIBILITY of looking “Tough & Strong” (according to the rules of Traditional Manhood) while going through the healing process.
Can you imagine what most civilian Men with trauma (unknown to them) think when there are no obvious scars on the outside of the Body & they first consider it? NO WAY!
The Balanced Man Plan is ideal for Men with Trauma because it has been created by a Professional Therapist – who is also a Man, Husband, Father - a s well as a Trauma Survivor – with Men in Mind.
It is no longer hard to get started with “taking a look under the hood” because the Self-Guided Coaching Plans in our Online Coaching for Men removes the following barriers commonly faced by Men with trauma:
Online Coaching for Men with Trauma
#1 Need for Men with Trauma – Privacy
First & foremost is the need for privacy. If you prefer some privacy while trying on different brands of blue jeans to make sure you have the right fit WITHOUT everyone seeing your bare butt, then you will like the privacy of our online coaching for men with trauma.
Our Balanced Man Plan is offered through Self-Guided Coaching Plans that are designed to give you the answers you are looking for with the kind of privacy you need. to feel safe & secure through the process.
Online Coaching for Men with Trauma
#2 Need for Men with Trauma – Relationship Coaching
For Men with trauma, issues in relationships tend to be a BIG concern. The closer & more intimate the relationship is, the more it tends to hold within it the harmful seeds distrust that were sowed in our childhood.
This means that romantic relationships and often Family relationships are most impacted for Men with trauma - while Friendships, business, relationships, etc. tend to be more stable.
When it comes to care for Men with trauma, relationship coaching is VITAL because when Boys are raised to be a “Real Man” according to the rules of Traditional Manhood, the common outcome is attachment injury – a disruption to a Person’s ability to create stable & satisfying relationships based on a lack of warm & accessible relationships growing up.
You can read a lot more about attachment styles, attachment injury, and healthy attachment in our other article about "Trauma Bonds" here.
The online coaching for Men with trauma offered by the Balanced Man Plan is designed to provide the knowledge and skills necessary to repair old wounds & restore a healthy balance in your most important relationships - as well the health of Self & Loved Ones.
Online Coaching for Men with Trauma
#3 Need for Men with Trauma – Control
Whether we are talking about Women OR Men with trauma, issues with control are often a part of surviving the original traumatic event(s) and afterwards, these habits can be TOUGH to break for any trauma survivor.
This is often harder for Men because as Boys, we are taught that a “Real Man” is always in control of the situation and NEVER has to ask for help – at risk of looking dependent & weak.
As a result, it is very important for Men with trauma to have as much healthy influence as possible in the healing process so this sense of safety can be restored for Men with trauma.
The online coaching for Men with trauma offered by the Balanced Man Plan has taken this into consideration with our Self-Guided Coaching Plans. They have been created by a Male Therapist who also happens to be a trauma survivor (read more here) to be accessed on YOUR time & in YOUR World.
Are you ready to take the power back? You can start with our FREE Introductory Self Guided Coaching Plan here.
Online Coaching for Men with Trauma
#4 Need for Men with Trauma – Support for Chronic Health Issues like Addiction, Depression, & Anxiety
Our founder Logan Cohen has dedicated his life to treating Men with trauma and has discovered that this is often the “missing link” underneath of chronic health issues like Addiction, Depression, Anxiety, & even cardiovascular diseases.
After over 15 years in the field with Men who are both high performing and in psychiatric hospitals alike, it became clear that both the severity of "mental illness" (and often physical illness too) were strongly related to certain combinations of behavior & personality traits.
The common combinations associated with Traditional Manhood - competition, self-reliance, emotional restriction, & avoidance of "female qualities" - can leave Men with FEW options to cope with daily life in Modern Society - and especially when they get stacked up.
In order to deal with the pressure, it is much more common for Men to withdraw from social connections when experiencing emotional pain when in fact, more open-ness to support from Loved Ones could do a lot of good! Many Men with trauma end up relying on compulsive escapism - whether this binge eating, over-working, habitual drug and/or alcohol use, etc.
Dr. Gabor Mate has been discussing the connections between Trauma & Addiction for decades & now other practitioners like Dr. Van Kolk are carrying the torch in mapping the connections between Men with trauma and their “physical illnesses.”
These Medical Doctors note that trauma is specifically an event that overwhelms the central nervous system, altering the way we process and recall memories. “Trauma is not the story of something that happened back then," Mate adds. "It’s the current imprint of that pain, horror, and fear living inside people.”
This means that common chronic health issues like Depression, Anxiety, Cardiovascular issues, Respiratory Illnesses and even insomnia are directly related to these unresolved traumas that lie dormant in our Mind & Body.
You can learn more about the connections between Adverse Childhood Experiences & Chronic Health Issues here.
The bottom line is that talk therapy is RARELY enough to treat trauma and in fact, treatment MUST include a holistic approach to relationships, physical health, and global day-to-day functioning. There needs to be a more global approach that takes ALL of the moving pieces into consideration, while ALSO building on a solid foundation that you can sustain in your own Daily Life.
This makes the online coaching offered by the Balanced Man Plan ideal for Men with trauma because our Self-Guided Coaching Plans address the entire Man – NOT just the specific illness. This way we can get to the “root cause” that drives the WHY behind addiction - so you can break free from old habits to experience a healthy balance.
The Online Life Coaching for Men offered by The Balanced Man Plan is an ideal place to start for Men whether you know unresolved trauma is an issue – either of the “little t or Big T variety” – OR, if you just think there might be something out of place & you are ready to create a healthier balance for yourself and Loved Ones. Once we get below the layers to address your foundation of balance, it is much easier to fix any cracks in the foundation to set you & your Loved Ones up for Happiness & Health.
My name is Logan Cohen and I am a Professional Therapist & Life Coach with over 10 years in the field of Counseling Psychology. I am a Clinical Supervisor for the American Association of Marriage & Family Therapy, as well as the founder of New Leaf Counseling Group, LLC in Charlotte, NC. After spending tens of thousands of clinical hours with my own clients, starting a successful group practice, as well as a beautiful Family, I “picked my head up from the grindstone” to check in on childhood Friends & Loved Ones.
I painfully discovered that more than a few of my childhood Friends passed away at a young age from preventable health conditions and decided that as a Man, Husband, Father, and Friend, I could no longer stand by as People suffered in silence and self-destruct rather than ask for help. It DOESN'T have to be like that and the natural healing methods offered by the Balanced Man Plan are designed to help People “get unstuck” and break free from old patterns that are the barriers between Self & quality of Life.
The Balanced Man Plan is a therapeutic digital experience delivered through Self-Guided Coaching Plans created by a Male Therapist with the common barriers & strengths of Men in mind. The Balanced Man Plan has the goal of introducing a natural Balance back into Life so it is sustainable for the optimal Health & Well-Being of Self and Loved Ones - and ALL from the privacy and comfort of Home.
If you have enjoyed what you see so far, check out our Self Guided Coaching Plans!